Archive for the ‘wife’ Tag

Lamentation Of A Husband   Leave a comment

    “If my wife knows that she is a direct beneficiary of my good vision, why does she fail to support it?”

     These were the words of a husband whose wife “disappointed” him. What really happened?

     The man is a retired worker in the private sector of the economy. He had spent all his life and income on the welfare of his household. The children were given the best in education to the pride of the family. In fact, these children can be called “the family investment”. The woman in the home (The home maker) has little contribution only known to her.

     After the husband’s retirement, things were not as usual. The man’s income is almost zero in that all his take-home from every part-time work he is engaged in cannot meet the needs of the family. Yet, the woman is still gainfully employed in government service. Many times there are pockets of rifts between the couple in respect of caring for the family. They are able to handle them because of their fath in Christ and the husband’s maturity.

     The home-maker always claim,
     “You are the head of the family, it is your sole responsibility to provide for your house-hold. No matter how rich I am, I must take from you.”

     This has been her motto during the man’s service years and after retirement until now.

     The husband loves to write and has written some books. He is trusting the Lord that He provides funds to publish them. He wants to introduce at least one of them into the market soonest.
     One day, some time ago, about two month into 2016, the two were discussing about the first book to publish. The man disclosed what the production cost will be ditto other costs. He also disclosed the target market that can never fail as well as the proposed selling price and the profit margin on the first impression of the Book.

     The wife was elated and she exclaimed,
     “Infact, I have to co-ordinanate the finances and direct the profit(s) of the books.”
     The husband looked at her with his index finger in his mouth inbetween his feet. “What’s happened?” the wife asked.
     “So, you know that you are worthy to be in charge of the cash proceeds from the books. Why have you not supported the publication of these books. You know how I wanted $50,000 only to start it; after running up and down without success, I chose to wait until the Lord opens a door.”

     “What are you driving at “she becomes anxious to know more.
     “Good of you! Towards the year end of 2015, you obtained a loan of $200,000 which you spent the way you wanted”. The man explained.
     “What’s new in that.”
     “Thank you , Don’t you know that if you had reserved $50,000 for the publication, at least on loan to me. You know I would repay you.”

     This almost degenerated into another round of argument, but the man dowsed the fire of ember that would have been fanned.

     Now, think on it, will she ever become the “Cash Director” she wanted? How soon would that be? Many people failed to realise that we are in partnership with God. He never fails to act well His own part but mankind truncate his own part. The book of Provebs states,
     “Whosoever keeps the fig tree will eat
          its fruit,
      So he who waits on his master will
          be honored.”    28:18. NKJV.

     Every woman has been created to be a builder of a home. To build one is one thing but to  build a happy one is another. Do you hope to reap bountifully from your home? Be wise and supportive of other people’s visions. You will surely derive expected and unexpected benefits from doing so. Do not cheat yourself. Do not be a loser? People love to shift the blame that emanate from their faults on another person. Where there is no one on whom to do this, they hold God responsible. They blame Him instead and not themselves. Act well your part and do so on time.
     Stay blessed and rapturable because the Lord is coming soon.

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Posted August 30, 2017 by 4thlink in For All

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Marital Costs   Leave a comment

     I had the grace to listen to an interview granted a journalist by a widow on a radio station in Nigeria on Saturday September 24, 2016. During the period, the young interviewer wanted to know about how the widow met her late husband who was an artist who was interested in protecting his tribal culture.

     According to the woman, she was a young lady who was ready for anything “fashion” from any society in the world. She was not ready to compromise her young lady’s lifestyle.

     On the commencement of his love relationship with the young man, he told her, “You cannot dress anyhow. You cannot embrace any mode of dressing, from any part of the world. My artistic work centers on protection of our own culture. You cannot dress to contradict what we stand to protect. You have to adjust where necessary.

     The woman said it was painful for her but because of the love she had for the man and what he stood for, she purposed to do away with her lifestyle to fit into his life and what he stood for.

     This woman was able to enter into the man’s heart without any reservation(s). the man became one with her. He did not hide anything for her. This helps the woman to continue the man’s art-work after his demise thirty years ago.

     I was impressed with the woman’s stories. All that she said contradicts what I have heard from some women in recent times.

     What can this be?

     Many women have complained that the beginning of their love relationship with their husbands was rosy and something to be proud of. However, along the line, things started to fall apart and the centre of their love affairs cannot hold.

     One question such women, and those who have the same dwindling love relationship, do not ask themselves is “What has this relationship cost me?” it is one easy thing to complain about your partner in love but very difficult to do a heart-search of yourself and this is very important. Certain women (and men) in love, have the erroneous believe that they are the ones to be loved, no matter their past lifestyle. They have no reason to bring in a positive change for the sake of the love they are into. Loving is a two-way affair. If someone sincerely loves you, the best thing to do is to love him (or her) in return.

     Every marriage has costs. If yours does not cost you anything, your love for your partner is in doubt. I don’t think it is even wrong to tag yourself as “an opportunist” ready to exploit whoever is in love  with you.

     Do not be an exploiter!

     Let me briefly share with you the testimony of a young woman.
     This sister is re-married to another man. According to her, her immediate past lifestyle was excellently rough. She has these to say,
     “I thank God that I am now married to my current husband. God has used him to put an end to previous lifestyle that may have swallowed me up. I really thank the Lord.”

     Do you believe that you can have a positive testimony better than this? Do not be too rigid in doing what is not good. Do not be wise in your own eyes. Consider the words of your partner. See reasons with him or her. You may not know now, it will be to your own advantages and it will enhance your relationship.
     Stay blessed and prepared for the second coming of the Lord Jesus Christ.
NOTE
All Scriptures quoted are from New King James Version of the Holy Bible.

Posted August 25, 2017 by 4thlink in For All

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Great Miracle!   Leave a comment

Wonderful God

A Muslim man in Egypt killed his wife because she was reading the Bible and then buried her with their infant baby and an 8 year old daughter.

حيث ان الفتيات دفنوا و هم أحياء ! و قام بتبليغ الشرطة بالحادثة متهما العم بجريمته . و بعد 15 يوما يموت أحد أفراد العائلة . و عندما أرادوا دفنه , وجدوا تحت الرمل الفتاتان الصغيرتان على قيد الحياة .

The girls were buried alive! then He reported to the police that an uncle killed the kids. 15 days later, another family member died. When they went to bury him, they found the 2 little girls under the sand – ALIVE!
هذه الحادثة أغضبت الناس و حكم على الرجل بالإعدام

The country is outraged over the incident, and the man will be executed.
وقد سؤلت الفتات الكبرى عن كيفيت بقائها على قيد الحياة , فقالت : ‘ كان يجيء إلينا كل يوم رجل , كان هذا الرجل يلبس ثياب مشعّة و كان له جروح نازفة في يديه , كان يأتي و يطعمنا . و قد أيقظ أمي و بتالي فقد أستطاعت أن ترضع أختي . ‘
قالت الفتات هذا الكلام في مقابلة على التلفزيون المصرية الوطنية , و أفادة امراة مسلمة عبرأخبار مؤكدة. قالت فيها على التلفزيون الشعبي : ‘ كان هذا بلا شك السيد المسيح , لأن لا أحد غيره يستطيع فعل مثل هكذا أشياء! ‘

The older girl was asked how she had survived and she says ‘A man wearing shiny clothes, with bleeding wounds in his hands, came every day to feed us. He woke up my mom so she could nurse my sister,’ she said.

She was interviewed on Egyptian National TV, by availed Muslim woman news anchor. She said on public TV, ‘This was none other than JESUS, because nobody else does things like this!’

المسلمون يؤمنون بأن السيد المسيح يستطيع فعل هذا , ولكن الجراح تشير إلى أن السيد المسح حقا قد صلب , وأيضا من الواضح أنه على قيد الحياة ! , وأيضا من الواضح أن الطفلة لا تستطيع أن تخترع قصة مثل تلك , و أساس فإن من المستحيل بقاء الطفلتان على قيد الحياة بدون معجزة حقيقية ,

Muslims believe Isa (JESUS) would do this, but the wounds mean He really was crucified, and it’s clear also that He is alive! But, it’s also clear that the child could not make up a story like this, and there is no way these children could have survived without a true miracle. Muslim leaders are going to have a hard time to figure out what to do with this, and the popularity of the Passion movie doesn’t help! With Egypt at the centre of the media and education in the Middle East , you can be sure this story will spread.

السيد المس يح ما زال يقلب العالم رأسا على عقب! رجاء دع هذه القصة تنتشر بين الناس. يقول الله : ‘أنا سأبارك الشخص الذي يضع ثقته فيّ.’ أرميا 17.

Christ is still turning the world upside down! Please let this story be shared. The Lord says, ‘I will bless the person who puts his trust in me.’ Jeremiah 17..
رجاء أرسل هذه الرسالة إلى كل قائمتك والله سيكافئك بوفرة! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Please forward these to all on your list and GOD will reward you abundantly!!!!!!!!!!!
Please finish reading before you do anything else right now.
Read this to the end. My name is God. I know you will give your time for me. I love you and always bless you. I am always with you. I need you to spend 30 minutes of your time with me today. Don’t pray. Just praise. Today I want this message across the world before midnight. Will you help? Please do not cut it and I’ll help you with something that you are in need of. A blessing is coming your way. Please drop everything & pass it on. Tomorrow will be the Best Day of your Life. Send this to  friends Trust God.

Posted July 4, 2017 by 4thlink in For All

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How I Spent My February 14, 2015.   Leave a comment

On Febuary 9, 2015, I began a prayer expedition or exploration that took me to many places as designed and commanded by God. On the sixth day which concidentally was a day set aside as ” Lovers’ Day” or “Valentine’s Day” named after saint Valentine. The day was a memorable one.

About 12:00 am on February 14, I was to hold a vigil with a family of seven persons : Father, mother and their five children. I invited the couple to have a few minute discussion with them. However, this went on for not less than one-and-a-half hours.

This family was not only living in abject poverty but also in serious bitterness of heart towards each other.

The husband confessed to hating prayers and he never hesitated to beat his wife anytime she persisted on inviting him to pray with her.

Not only this, the man identified “lack of money” as their main cause of bitterness towards each other.

The wife politely hesitated and declared that love and understanding are the core missing ingredients in their marital meal. She also pointed out that if there is money and those materials are absent, there will be no joy and sweetness.

Then the work began.

The Holy Spirit took over, we, without previous planning, discussed everything based on I Corinthians chapter thirteen. Each verse was well analysed and they reasoned together with me on what the Holy Spirit shared with us.

Finally, we prayed together and I separated them to pray on there own as a family which lasted a few minutes to four o’clock on the a.m.side. Now, he husband has developed interest in praying with the wife.

Glory be to God!

Do you know what? That was the first time I have met with them.
This happened on a Lovers’ day.

By God’s special grace , I , by the help of the Holy Spirit , spent quality time running into hours reading and meditating on my Lover’s love letters, The Holy Bible , which really opened my eyes to many things in those letters.

After this I decided to share my love with others with the following words:
“The steadfast love of the Lord will never cease in your life and His mercy will never come to an end. Both will become new each day. Happy Valentine’s day!”

Stay blessed and rapturable because the Lord is coming soon.

How To Please Your Wife At All Costs   Leave a comment

“But I want you to be without care.
He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord- how he may please the Lord.
But he who is married cares about the things of the world- how he may please his wife.” 1 Corinthians 7:32-33.

A common desire of every female, irrespective of her age, is to have a “caring husband”. This is good and worthy of being desired. Any responsible married man must be caring. Any man who is not ready to do this is not prepared to be married.

The Lord made it a law of relationship to His people, Isreal of old, in Exodus 20:10,
“…he shall not diminish her food, her clothing, and her marrriage rights.” New King James Version.

Every matured man (read my article “Am I matured for marrriage?”) must be ready to care for his wife and children in obedience to the Lord.

To be caring is a direct product of love that a man has for his wife. It is true that hardly will one cares for what one does not love. What you do not love, you will not value and will not enjoy your care.

It is important to note that love between couples emanate ONLY from the love they have for the Lord, their Lord. This is LOVE INDEED. Any type that has its offshoot from another source is either lust or evil desire. This will not last for long and its end is disaster.

Now, does pleasing your wife entail doing so AT ALL COST?

No gainsaying the fact that Father Abraham was a lover of his wife, Mother Sarah. The woman was barren for a long period of time. It was sure that the man was not happy at this. He wanted to please his wife but to give a child is beyond his power.

One day, his wife came up with a “good idea” that she hoped would bring some form of happiness into her heart. She then demanded from her husband,
“See now, the Lord has restrained me from bearing children.
Please, go in to my maid; perhaps I shall obtain children by her.” Genesis 16:2 .

Father Abraham, as a caring husband who wanted to please his wife welcomed the “good idea”; so, “…he went in to Hagar, and she conceived…” verse 4.

Within the household, this singular action bred animosity; it also exhibited the imperfect heart of Father Abraham towards his friend, God because the “good idea” was not God’s idea.

Immediately after the going in and conception, the Almighty God complained to him,
“I am Almighty God, walk before Me and be blameless.” Genesis 17:1. New King James Version.

God had purposed to multiply the couple in HIS OWN WAY and TIME. He said to Abraham,
“As for Sarai your wife, you shall not call her name Sarai, but Sarah shall be her name.
And I will bless her and also give you a son by her; then I will bless her, she shall be a mother of nations;
kings of people shall be from her.” Genesis 17:15-16.

At the end of the day, God’s plan came to pass fully.

Do you know that Abraham’s attempt to please his wife created a lasting problem until today? The product (Ishmael) of Abraham and Hagar, the Egyptian maid had this destiny:
“He shall be a wild man,
his hand shall be against every man,
And every man’s hand against him.
And he shall dwell in the presence of all his brethren” Genesis 16:12.

Until now, there are hot spots and restless areas in the world today and certain groups are causing troubles in nations just because sometime ago, a man wanted to please his wife.

It is right and needful to desire and determine to please your wife but do not forget that you must consider it very well if what your wife wants from you will surely, not perhaps, bring her desired joy. Will it also ensure your rightful place before the Almighty God is not shaking?

Finally, will it not bring others into trouble now or in future?
Therefore, consider very well whether or not you must please your wife at all costs.
Stay blessed and rapturable; the Lord is coming soon.

Posted March 29, 2015 by 4thlink in For Daddy

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Am I Matured To Be Married?   Leave a comment

In part two of this article, I have discussed two of the six areas you must be matured before you can contemplate marriage. These are Physical and Spiritual maturity.

Now, let me continue with the next ones.

THREE.
Emotional Maturity.
As of the time of writing this piece, I heard a news report on a radio station that a three-month old marriage failed. The reason given was that the husband used to beat his wife mercilessly.

Huuuuuh! Do you say it is a crude and an uncivilized way of life? Yes! I agree with you.

A little analysis will surely reveal that both were not matured emotionally. To save lives, a court of law allowed them to part ways and costs were awarded.

Fine!

However, was that marrriage a success? No! Do you know that something that was wrongly handled started it all?

Let me state here that the marrriage lived long. A three-month old one dissolved? Read this also:

A wedding ceremony took place in Nigeria more than a decade ago which gulped millions of dollars which involved a senior army officer who led a young lady to the altar.

Great and influential people graced the wedding ceremony with expensive gifts given. It is sad that the marrriage lasted only twenty-seven (27) days.

What were the reasons given by the couple in the court of law?
The wife who initiated divorce accused the husband of “unconventional sexual demands”.

The man also accused her of “being a gold digger” who was only interested in his money.

These are weak reasons that brought a potential successful marrriage to a halt abruptly. An emotional maturity could have helped them; it can help those going in their way also.

To be emotionally matured also begins and ends with God. Every man and woman must follow the right path like the nation of Judah.

How?

“And all Judah rejoiced at the oath, for they had sworn with all their heart and sought Him with all their soul; and He was found by them, and the Lord gave them rest all round.” 2 Chronicles 15:15; New King James Version.

Do you want rest all round? If your answer is “yes!”, then you must walk in the right way to receive it.
Your soul or place of desire must be the Lords. Mark 12:30 requires you to
“Love the Lord your God with all your heart (spirit)”, with all your soul (emotions), with all your mind (mental) and with all your strength(physical)”. New King James Version. Words in brackets were added.

If you can do this, your emotions will be under the strict control of the spirit of God. You will not do anything on impulses. You will not be rash.

Not only this, you deserve spiritual food which is available in the Holy Bible. You must feast on it regularly to know what is good for your life and to flee from those poisonous materials dangerous to it.

It is only then that you can be “deaf” as a man and “blind” as a woman.

What does this mean?

A “deaf” man does not hear what a woman says to provoke him. It is only when you are blind as a woman that you will not see the faults or wrong acts of your man or man-to-be that can irritate you.
With the help of the Spirit of God, you should be able to control your emotions.

Your emotional maturity will be hastened if you are very close to the Word of God. It will reveal to you how to deal with every negative emotions.

For example, the Scriptures declares,
“Anger rests in the bosom of fools.” Ecclesiastes 7:9.
Then, do you want to be a fool? God forbid! It is worthy of note that anger is an emotion that easily destroys things.

Let me give you an example here:

An emotionally matured woman was called on phone by her husband to meet him in his office so they could go home together in his car.

The woman demanded that he comes to her office to give her the ride because it was about to rain . The man refused because it was “easier” for her to come to his office and go home. The man’s office was on the way to their house.

After the man could no longer wait, he went home alone.

It rained heavily in such a way that the woman could not escape it.

Before she arrived home, her husband was well prepared for accusations from her and defense was solid.

He was grossly disappointed!

On arrival, the wife presented him with two hot fresh ears of corn, her husband’s delight. He protected them with everything she had to ensure it remained fresh and warm, the rain notwithstanding.

Can you do this?

I think you understand better what being emotionally matured means.

“Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:31-32.

Therefore, be emotionally matured, please!
Stay blessed and rapturable.

Posted February 3, 2015 by 4thlink in For All

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Seven Dangers Involved In Immaturity Before Marriage.   Leave a comment

What marrriage has become is not what God planned it to be. So many factors have defaced and outrightly changed it. One of such factors is IMMATURITY. In brief , let us discuss SEVEN DANGERS involved in this.

ONE: Sudden death.
There are cases of sudden death resulting from immaturity in marrriage. This cut across races and culture. Husband have shot their wives dead over trivialities that saturate marrriages; wives have piosoned their own husbands because of unsubstantiated suspicions.

The list is endless!

TWO: Divorce. Divorce has become an “easy option” today. This has taken place on any flimsy excuse that have been balooned in the court of law. The facts presented before judges have been enlarged out of proportion; so judges have no choices but to dissolve many marriages.

Whereas, maturity before marrriage would have saved many.

“For the Lord God of Israel says
That He hates divorce…” Malachi 2:16 a-b. New King James Version.

Do you want to involve yourself in what God hate?.

Watch it!

Three: SEPARATION.
This is seen by many people as a “better option” to divorce. For many reasons people prefer separation to divorce.

To cover up, they will appear “as if” they are husband and wife when “love” has ceased to exist. In this case, depending on ages of the children , and other factors, they “share” the children.

Four:- LIVING LIKE A CAT AND A MOUSE.
Late october 2014, I heard a story of a couple who live under one roof but never see each other’s face. They have partitioned the house very well that they cannot see or meet each other.

When their children are on holiday from school, for a month, these children will spend two weeks with the mother in her “apartment” while the other two weeks will be spent with their father.

In another family, they did not talk together. They write on paper anything they wanted to say.

The wife would write, “Your food is ready, take it in the kitchen.”

“I have put money on the dinning table to buy foodstuffs for the month” the husband would write.

Is this good?

Five: – A SAD LIFE.
The initial plan of God to institute marrriage is for both man and woman to live joyfully. Joy has eluded many homes today. There are couples today who live together BUT without JOY. They easily “see” their plight as “my cross”. So, the husband becomes “a cross” to carry for the wife and vice versa.

This ought not to be so.

A man of God on a wedding day narrated his experience with a couple. They were neighbours. The husband went to the man of God when meditating in the word of God one day. He explained that things have gone wrong in his home for years now.

The man of God was surprised because they always go out together wearing the same type of clothes, shoes, and so on. Young men and women used to pray for their kind of home, not knowing what is going on.

The man if God pointed to this but the man replied,
“Our clothes, shoes are always uniform but our lives are not as people see us. Love is lost!”
Immaturity abhors this danger.

Please, bear with me, read the concluding part in the next piece.

Posted January 14, 2015 by 4thlink in For All

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